I like to give and enjoy seeing a smile on someone’s face – but lately – I feel rather unappreciated. It seems that most people aren’t interested in the little things any more. They seem to choose bigger and better things to do all the time and these tend to cost an arm and a leg too. I think that it’s something on the lines of a “keeping up with the Joneses” complex that’s sweeping the world.
People seem to take all the support you can possibly give and toss you to the kerb when they find someone “better”. I’ve said it before in another post – there are exceptions out there. These people tend to be loyal; they are supportive even if they are too many kilometres away for a face to face visit. They always seem to understand and tend to give as much to you as you give to them. These are the ones that you will find the connection between you will never fade over the years.
A hand-made card or meaningful gift is more important than a bigger more expensive gift. It shows that you took the time to listen when someone told you about their life. One of my favourite lines from a movie is that when you get married you have someone to witness your life – your partner is saying your life won’t go by unnoticed. To me you could say the same thing about a true friendship. Now that’s appreciation…
This brings me to the point of doing too much for people.
Is it the same with people you meet / family / friends? Do people become more “leech” like when you give them too much or do too much for them?
Just wondering???
I think that a true friend will never push you to a kerb, they will never be a leech, and they never repeat something told to them in confidence… they never change…
Thank you to the rare beautiful souls out there. There are way too few of you… you inspire me…
Here’s a little something I just received from a friend. I think this BBM was timed to perfection.
Think about this for a minute.
If I happened to show up on your door step crying, would you care?
If I called and asked you to pick me up because something happened would you come?
If I had one day left to live would you be part of my last day?
If I needed a shoulder to cry on, would you give me yours?
Do you know what the relationship is between your eyes? They blink together, they cry together. They see things together, and the sleep together, BUT THEY NEVER SEE EACH OTHER….
That’s what friendship is. Life is lonely without friends.
Its world best friend week.
Thanks Janine.
P.S. BLOG UPDATE: I have been working on new features on my blog over the past few days. If you look at the right hand column there is a new gadget with allows you to become an email subscriber.
Remember to find Di Doodles About Stuff on Facebook and like the page.
I post orphan pets on the page looking for new homes.
You will also see competitions to various animal charities and tips on how to support them.
Also in the right hand column on my blog you will see popular posts. Please check out the Tribute to Romeo post. The Romeo’s Wish Raffle has been extended to the 11th May. Tickets are only R50 – take a look at those prizes! You can say that by donating R50 to an animal charity you have a chance to win some super goodies.
I hope you all have a lovely day!
Di
Beautiful and true sentiments, Di, and I think many more people need to think like this!
ReplyDeleteThank you again for your unfailing support of Romeo's Wish - you're a true angel xxx
Thankyou For being an awesome follower!
ReplyDeleteWhat you have done to keep Romeo's memory alive is nothing short of amazing.
I would have still been mourning and would never have thought of acting so fast and creating such a brilliant initiative.
You deserve all the support you can get. ;)
Lovely post, Di :) When I was very much younger it used to bother me when I'd put in a lot of time, effort and love doing those special little things you are talking about that show you care. When the recipient was grateful I felt happy and fulfilled. When the recipient was unable or unwilling to accept my gift in the manner in which I hoped, I would become disheartened and disappointed. In time, I learnt to give without any expectation attached. It took several years to get it right, but once I'd mastered it, it freed me from experiencing disappointment and from becoming bitter. I also learnt to be more discerning.
ReplyDeleteLinda is so lucky to have such a wise mom like you.
ReplyDeleteI appreciate your comment.
I love giving and I don't expect anything in return. I guess I've always been like that.
When my grandparents were ill I was always the one who moved in and helped.
When My gran had her major stroke it got me to fail mid year exams but I had a hand in helping my gran walk again. That was the best thing I could have ever done.
Recently I've simply been tossed aside by some friends / people. One got angry because I was sharing more of my blog and my passion for animals. Another was jealous and began false rumours.
It just kills me that these people I thought I was close to found it so easy to leave me at the kerb.
I love this post Di. I feel like people don't appreciate the time you give them, a lot of emphasis is put on materials e.g. If a friend is having a function in their home say in Eastern Cape I'll travel and spend about R2000 on transport to give her support and to help with the physical work. If I don't have a present or say I'll give it to her later chances are she wont talk to me. I mean what is a present compared to the time you took to support her? Time is our most precious resource but people fail to appreciate that. I'm worried about our generation and the issue of appreciation, it is a big concern. Thank you for this post.
ReplyDeleteMe again :)
ReplyDeleteIn regard to my comment of not expecting anything back in return for what I've done or given, I meant that purely in terms of the expectations I would have to feel appreciated. I do not ever give in order to receive material things in return, but I used to expect to be appreciated and, when I wasn't it would cause me to feel unhappy.
It is a normal human response and core need to want to be appreciated and while I feel we have every right to want this, we cannot expect it, because so many do not have the capacity within themselves to receive in the right way. There truly is an art to both giving and receiving. There are those who will just keep on taking and this is where we need to exercise discretion.
@ Thuli, So glad you could eventually comment!
ReplyDeleteI'm pleased that I'm not the only person who feels this way.
@ Desiree, thank you again for your in put. That's exactly my point. I wish I had a radar detector for users!
Its so much easier dealing with people who understand. Lesson learned I suppose.